Do not be fooled by its sleek appearance. It is evil. This post has been long coming, but I've never found time to actually list down ALL the faults that my Sony Ericsson W302 has. Repeat after me, Sony Ericsson W302. Etch this model name into your permanent memory - and NEVER buy it. NEVER. I tell you. You have been warned.
The last straw that broke the camel's back was when the vibrating function decided to stop working yesterday. Oh yes, my phone has a mind of its own. Fuck firmware, fuck algorithms, it operates on hormones. Raging teenage hormones, not malfunctioning impotent ones. No offense to any malfunctioning impotent ones out there.
So here goes my list of SE W302 irritants.
- It screens my calls. At whim, it decides not to receive calls. My mum would say, what happened to you yesterday? Why didn't you take our calls? Are you hiding something from us? What do you have behind your back? Why are you doing this to us???? (OK dramatized a bit)
- Likewise with SMSes. It keeps SMSes from me! Does your phone keep SMSes from you? No? Well mine does. Sometimes SMSes get delayed for more than 24 hours. I - freaking - hate - it. I've missed dates because of this. In fact, I didn't get to see the dragonboat race last weekend, because I didn't get the SMS in time. *stomps on phone*
- Taking pictures. My phone rotates the portrait pictures to landscape, automatically, and doesn't allow you to rotate it back. HOW CACAT IS THIS. Sony Ericsson why are you killing my soul.
- Writing SMSes. Suddenly, mid-sentence, it would caps one of the words. For no good reason, just because it can. For example, "Hey i am sorry i Didn't get your sms Yesterday. I am sticking a fork into My phone now." See the irritating caps, at random? There is no logic. Arrrgh.
- Delivery reports. Both my old SE phones, K300i and W910i, had this nifty tick on the sent messages whenever the reports (that the message is delivered) are received. I love this feature. W302, however, is the black sheep of the family. It decided to go down the road of some Nokia phones, sending reports in the form of messages, clogging up my inbox with useless empty report messages, forcing me to delete them periodically. Wasting my precious time which I use for procrastinating. Now I have less time to procrastinate, and it's all my phone's fault.
- No Chinese input. Cacat phone don't know from where wann. I don't type Chinese often but I like the option to. There are some phrases that you can't express in English - such as, 风萧萧兮易水寒，壮士一去兮不复返 - how the hell do you say it in English? (Wind xiao xiao xi water easy to be cold, big man leaves xi and doesn't come back - just doesn't cut it)
- Earpiece has ceased to work properly and I have to adjust the connector to a certain angle so that both my ears get the music, or else one ear would have to imagine the tune. And my ears don't like imagining tunes.
- You know, with MOST SE phones, you can put a monthly calendar as a shortcut? Well, my phone doesn't do that. It gives me, the most, the option to put a weekly task schedule thingy. Who needs a weekly task schedule thingy?? I want my freaking month so that I can explain to my friends the dates that I am not in Singapore! Freaking sorry excuse of a phone!
- The useless and redundant "Music" button. Redundant because there's already a Walkman button, which leads to the playlist, which is good enough. Useless because you can only play one file at a time when you're at the "Music" section. Why is it even there, when you already have the Walkman functions. I understand my phone as well as most men understand women. And everybody knows that men are clueless about women.
- No vibration. The ring tone is soft as it is, and now it doesn't even vibrate, so I have to check my phone periodically to see that I don't have calls or messages, and if I don't I will wonder if I really don't, or it is my phone screening them again. There's no trust between me and my phone. The only reason why I'm still keeping it is because I am too broke to buy another one. When I get rich, I swear I'll buy a monster tank just so that I can roll over this freaking phone, over and over again, until it is even more useless than it is now, if that is even possible.
The leeches are probably behind this. Somehow. 
