Showing posts with label screw-ups. Show all posts
Showing posts with label screw-ups. Show all posts

At the gym.

So this morning I went to the gym, just like my song said I would. And I had the stupidest accident of all gym accidents: The Classic Slip On The Treadmill where I slipped, crashed on the runway and got thrown back like a rag doll. You know that one.

What happened was, I thought I had finally figured out a way to combat gym boredom - I'd listen to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy audiobooks! So that was what I did. And of course the inevitable happened. I was chuckling at some jokes (really, Douglas Adams can be very funny) when I lost my footing and performed a perfect rendition of The Classic Slip On The Treadmill.

I sat on the floor with a hurt left knee and a scraped right shin, waiting to catch my breath and to get the green light from my legs that they were ready to support my weight again. The treadmill was still running. And you know what happened?

Nothing. Nothing happened. There was 10-15 people in the gym, and they acted like nothing had happened. For the 30 seconds that I sat there, panting and massaging my knee, nobody came up to me to ask if I was okay, or if I needed help. They continued running, lifting weights, admiring themselves in the mirror, etc. It was like I was invisible, and the racket that I made slamming my body weight on the machine and then the ground was in a vacuum and therefore silent.

30 seconds later, I picked myself up, put myself on the treadmill again, and ran another 10 minutes in defiance to the mass apathy of my gymming counterparts.

I am regretting that 10 minutes now. My knee hurts and I have to hobble around. Hopefully it will be alright after some rest. But seriously, people? What does it take to just stop what you're doing for 10 seconds, walk up to a person who looks like she's hurt, and see if she's alright? I mean, I would do it without a thought.

Or maybe I'm just more invisible than I thought I was.

Helter skelter.

"If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclinations for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and incredible beauty." ~ Jon Krakauer.

My brain is quite dry at the moment, though I feel like blogging. There is nothing much to say, it was a lazy Sunday that involved me changing the lightbulbs of my room and snapping a ukulele string. Through googling for musical instrument shops in Singapore, I found out that Singapore has a ukulele shop as of January 2009, which means that there is no real reason why I should have bought my uke in London. (It does justify the London patch that I am going to sew onto the case though.) However it will be very handy for getting new strings, and in the future, books, when I have finished the three that I have bought.

The reason why I got the musical instruments (the ukulele and Irish tin whistle) is that I have this urge to pick up piano playing again. But a keyboard would be too big an investment, and I don't know if I would actually see it through. The compromising solution is therefore to buy some cheap instruments and learn them, establishing some kind of music routine in my life, like 30-60 minutes a day, just for practising. And I figure that, once I get used to this idea of playing music every day, I can then make a keyboard-buying commitment. But first - to replace the ukulele string.

Work starts tomorrow. I don't have the keys to my office room, because if you recall, I dropped them into the rain hole (unintentionally, damnit) right before I left for Europe. While we're on the subject I actually lost my wallet on my last day in Europe, on an airport shuttlebus in Berlin. Luckily I was able to retrieve it from the airport Lost and Found, with the kind help of Imre, my host. Later when he was sending me off at the airport, I almost missed the flight because we mistook the flight number for the flight time - I was supposed to fly at 1800, and the flight number was KL1830. Therefore we thought that it was a 6:30pm flight - and I got a horrid shock when I realized that it was actually 6pm when my flight was supposed to leave! Luckily I didn't get there too late and made the 6pm flight anyway. Why do things like that keep happening to me??

Anyway, I should go to bed. To people anticipating my emails, I'm on them. Soon. Ciao!

-2: Nightmare on Jurong West St 92.

Woke up with a jolt at 5am to tell myself to write. I wrote some, and went back to sleep, and had a nightmare that I woke up again and it was 3:30pm already and I spent half of the day sleeping! Half of the day wasted! And while I was trying to come to terms with that a phone call came in offering me a PhD in Sri Lanka (huh?) and while I was trying to talk to this guy on the phone some kids and a dodgy looking adult were trying to climb into my window (nine floors up) and I had to fight them off but try not to swat them away 'coz the fall would kill them.

Jolted awake again and it's 8am in the morning. Crazy ass dream.

*update*
Something completely ridiculous happened to me. I was putting on my sandals with my office keys in my hand, when I fumbled a little and the keys slipped from my hand. And went straight down into what I call the "rain hole", i.e. a small drain in front of my door that probably leads to a pipe that goes nine floors down with no brakes. My keys went, with my anguished and helpless "FUCKKKKKKKK" following close. What are the odds that my keys fall into a round hole which probably only has a 10cm diameter??

Well at least the loss was clearcut in terms of any possible salvage, so beyond staring at a bottomless hole in disbelief I couldn't do anything, and moved on in 10 seconds. I'll just have to go and report the loss and go through some stupid paperwork and payments to get my keys back again. Bad news is - I have no idea where the general office is as they're renovating the damn office right now. I don't know where to find the person that I need to see. Good news is - I won't be needing the keys for at least two months. Which means I'll have to finish my work by today. Maybe this is some sort of sign.

Dead drafts.

I've got stuff to say but they keep jumbling themselves up, getting tangled in different strains of thought, that I have had to delete multiple paragraphs and start over. So although you are reading this in the first paragraph, try imagining like ten invisible paragraphs on top of each other, buried in layers, and this is the fortunate top layer that gets to stay.

Not unlike the cemetery that I went to in Boston where the tour guide was explaining to people that people used to point out the plot that they wanted to be buried at, which is fine, except that it was someone else's plot. What they did was just crush the bones of the previous dead person and bury the new dead person on top. Apparently it was a thriving business (at about $8-$12 a plot) back then until it got banned. Every grave had 2-12 dead people in it. I bet they're having a party down there with all the mangled bones.

Rest in peace my dead drafts.

See, that's the problem. I start thinking of something and it gets led onto some totally different tangent and there is not really a point to what I'm writing. Perhaps I'm just purging the contents and mess in my brain. The same mess in my brain that caused me to think that Val was coming yesterday, resulting in my whole family in KL anticipating his arrival because he's spending a night in KL before going to Phnom Penh before meeting me and Jia Ling in Kuching, but of course he didn't call because he is arriving tomorrow. Sucks to screw up so royally. But I'm glad I mixed up instead of him missing his flight, for example.

Too many things to think about. Of course mostly I'm thinking about my research, because I don't have a choice, but I shall not dwell on that because it is boring. To you anyway. Actually to me too because the same ideas circle my head, I don't know why, maybe because subconsciously I'm terrified if I would lose the fruit of my thoughts. I have pages of notes where I write about virtually the same thing to refresh and make sense of the ideas.

Dragonboating. On how I should train more extensively to really master it because I want to know that I am doing it the right way. I'm thinking of going for Wednesday trainings, maybe after March, because it's more intensive training which would be useful for building stamina, muscle and technique. Sure it would involve a lot of pain but what is new. And it looks like that's the only way to get better, which is something that I want. David Blaine didn't get to break the longest held breath record (17mins) by installing a pipe in his lungs. (He tried but it didn't work.) He did it through perseverance and trying all means possible, and lots of training and mental strength. (TED)

And that applies to so many different areas of my life. Travel for instance.

Erm. I just realized that there are not too many areas of my life. Research, dragonboating, travelling. But I'm pouring myself whole-heartedly into them. I like my life because I try putting only the good bits in it. It's not that it doesn't have bad bits. But usually if you make an effort and be less scared, you are able to put big chunks of good bits in to outweigh the bad bits.

A visualization if you need one:
11111110101111111111110011111101110111111111

I'm going to the museum today to look at ancient Egyptian dead bodies. And later a free concert in the botanical gardens. Today's gonna be a good day! Shall go get breakfast for necessary nutrients for mummy-gazing.

Kena curi lagi

It is that time of the year again. What time of the year, you ask. Well, the time of the year when I get my personal belongings stolen, of course. What else?

Last year on November 27th, I was robbed in Kota Kinabalu. This year on November 28th, I lost my bag and its entire contents to a thief who somehow figured out the padlock combination of our dragonboat locker cage. Five or six bags were stolen, including mine. This is the first time that something of the sort has happened in my team, although someone cut through the American team's cage before, apparently.

Things I lost: My trusty Esprit bag, which YKent who bought it from Hong Kong sold to me, and it has weathered through so many conditions formal or rough because it's so versatile. Sigh. It was a good bag. My wallet which was cheap and falling apart, so no love lost there. S$100 which I had just withdrawn the day before, and a couple of hundred RM, which, don't ask me why I was bringing all around Singapore when they don't accept RM here. My student ID, my debit card (which has 2 bucks in it, they're welcome to it), my ATM card, my EZLink card, random transport cards that I collected from the US. My phone, the one that I hated. Well good riddance, except that all my contacts and sim card were in it. My umbrella. A library book - Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility, which I had not finished, damn it. And it looked pretty old too, bet it was published a long time ago... well, let's just hope that the thieving bastards would appreciate classic literature. My Vegetarian t-shirt =( and my very absorbent gym towel. My house keys.

Things I didn't lose: More important forms of ID - my passport and Malaysian IC or driver's license. My research notes and camera which I took out right before I left, because I didn't want to make them wet.

Things I thought I had lost but didn't: my pencil case, my supervisor's library book, the cable for my external hard disk, my mp3 player which contained the 3-hour interview with Tope my Nigerian CSer (!!!).

All in all I suppose the damage wasn't huge, since most of the stuff that I lost are replaceable, apart from that vegetarian t-shirt that I got from San Fran... but I guess I could be thankful to the fact that I didn't lose my Old School or "If you can read this: make me a sandwich" t-shirts that are my favouritest t-shirts in the world, bought from Wellington, which have been with me through thick and thin, through leech infested tropical jungles and dry dusty deserts. Sucks that I lost all that money, but then money doesn't have emotional value so that's fine. Ambivalent that I lost my phone, along with it old and musty messages that hinted of relationships that could have been, people whom I've lost contact with, dear messages from my good friends that I can always accummulate again. I shall think of it as a yearly cleansing ritual, losing a phone and all the contacts, and building up again the core of people who matter.

The police took ages to arrive and in the meanwhile everyone crowded around to cancel credit cards and phone cards. The ones who weren't affected stayed back to give emotional support. There was this British uncle who kept growling in frustration every five minutes, haha. A really nice Indian guy loaned me 50 bucks. People kept speculating how it happened, and after they had already exhausted the possible scenarios they just repeated themselves over again.

After settling the collective police report (I'll have to make another individual report later) - I had a fifty dollar bill on me and a card with the case report written on it. And an old energy bar wrapper in the back pocket of my shorts, from the Grand Canyon hike. I could choose to go home, and wait till Housemate David gets home, but that could be a long wait. I decided to go get my sim card fixed at Raffles City instead. Then I changed my mind because I didn't have any form of ID on me and they probably wouldn't take my case; so I took a map from the Concierge and ran all the way to Chinatown to catch the free public screening of Gubra, a film by late Yasmin Ahmad, my favourite Malaysian director. After watching the (really good) movie I met Adibah (a Singaporean CSer) and her friends by chance, and they walked me to Outram Park MRT, although I told them that I couldn't be mugged since I didn't have anything on me. Well apart from 48 bucks and a case card and a Singapore map, but what are the odds, seriously?

There I took an MRT back to Pioneer, stinking everyone within a 3 feet radius of me with a combination of dried sweat and dried river water. After that I walked home from Pioneer MRT. Apparently it only takes less than 20 minutes, and it was nice walking under the night breeze in the knowledge that I had already exhausted the probabilistic quota of being robbed within a day.

This one's for Jason.

"You just have to be there 20 minutes before departure," said Kingston. "I don't like reaching early because I feel stupid wasting time in the airport."

"So let me get this straight. You'd rather miss your flight than feel stupid?"

"Yup pretty much." With this seemingly innocuous ending to our conversation, we bade each other goodnight and goodbye. I was to leave early in the morning so he wouldn't be able to send me off then.

Kingston and I had not met for about two years, but we clicked immediately, as evident from our endless conversations on his couch that I claimed as mine in New York. I was sorry that I had to leave, but San Francisco was waiting. My flight was at 7am this morning. The plan was to get out the house at 5am, and with any luck I would reach the airport by 6:30am.

When I said "with any luck" I did not foresee that I would actually need it. The first thing that went wrong was me waking up late, and after double and triple checking that I did not leave anything behind, I left the house 15 minutes off schedule. I reached the subway station, huffing and puffing with my ridiculously heavy trolley bag in tow. It was 5:30am. Seemed like I could still make it.

I waited at the subway station until about 5:55am, when I felt that something was terribly wrong. At first I persuaded myself that it was just a normal occurrence for the train to be late for ten minutes. With every passing minute I grew more and more fidgety. But when someone actually went and queried the station master, it turned out that someone had pulled the emergency brake at one of the prior stations. The whole track was at a standstill. This did not look good at all.

One of the waiting passengers, after he learned about my dire situation, proposed that we share a cab to the airport. Apparently he was working in the JFK airport at one of the control stations. So off we went. At this time I was rather relieved that the cab solution presented itself. I still had about 40 minutes till 6:40. Once we boarded the cab (which he had to run into the middle of the road to flag down), I relaxed and felt that I would make it after all. Thus I started making small talk and learned that my saviour's name was Jason.

In contrast with my chilled attitude, Jason still seemed highly strung. When he started to check my flight number and making calls to his colleague - "I can't promise you anything, but we'll try to get you through" - I realized that I was totally oblivious to the fact that I was still in high risk of missing my plane. Delta had a 30-minute check-in policy. It was 6:10am and we were still on the highway. It was probably a good time to start panicking.

When we finally reached Terminal 2, it was about 6:20am. Jason took care of the taxi bill by credit card and wouldn't accept anything from me except a $2 to get a coffee later. Plus tip it was almost a $40 ride. I was quite overwhelmed with gratitude but there was no time for that. We broke into a sprint once we got off the taxi. Jason cut me through all the queues with his work badge and outraged "someone pulled the subway brakes today, we were both fucked" pitch, and got me successfully to the security check. It was 6:40am. There was no time to check in my luggage. We had to dispose of all my toiletries above 100ml (T_T mahalnya) to put everything in as hand luggage.

Jason left me at the security gates with a hurried goodbye and good luck. He was also late for work, and I could only thank his fleeting silhouette as he bounded off towards another direction. His random act of kindness saved me at least $150. Pity I don't even know his last name.

The plane left the dock at 6:55am. I had scraped through, just barely. In the plane one of the stewards approached me to ask me if I had any problems "on the ground". After a moment of puzzlement and checking my feet out, I realized that he was asking me about my almost missing the flight back in New York. Looks like Jason's phone call did get through to someone.

So this one's for the great guy Jason who was originally from LA, who's working at the control station of Terminal 2, JFK International Airport, New York. I would also like to take the opportunity to thank another kind old lady who I met in Nelson, NZ, whom I desperately flagged down with my thumb to get me to the bus station for the bus to Greymouth. She managed to stop the moving bus by pulling over right in front of its path, so that I could get on it. The feat was ever more daring when we consider that the kind old lady was probably at least 65 years old and logically would not have much practical bus-stopping experiences as such.

And yes, I should really learn from my near misses by now.

I'm typing this in Berkeley now, where I'm just hanging out in a cafe that has free wifi, until my host returns from work. I'm pretty tired, having slept for only 2 hours yesterday night. And today's going to be longer because there is a 3-hour time difference between the east coast and the west coast. It's 5:45pm at New York/Boston now but only 2:45pm at San Francisco. I think I might still have time to do another post with pictures. Taking that back. Too lazy.

when it rains it pours

i am now at jia ling's, using her laptop which has a different keyboard layout from mine, so i shall not bother to caps this post.

the reason why i'm here is because we were at singapore general hospital (hereforth known as sgh) in the accidents and emergency room (a&e) yesterday till about 11pm so i decided to stay over. jia ling was walking down a stationary escalator yesterday and landed wrongly on the half step, so she hurt her ankle and rode an ambulance to the hospital. i'm secretly disappointed that i didn't get to go on the ambulance with her, because they would only allow one to accompany, and there was me and another friend callie, so we decided to do it the adult way and take the public transport to sgh instead. (it's a sad day when you can't use tantrums to get your way anymore.)

yesterday was easily one of the most eventful days that i've had in singapore to date. it started off like any other day. 

no actually it did not. i started the day by dressing up for an indian wedding. jia ling's colleague's daughter was getting married and since we were close like that, i decided to go give her my best blessings. chose something to wear, asked namrita if it was appropriate, apparently it was not, changed into something else, and set off to meet jia ling. the wedding was held in a hall in an indian temple nearby farrer park mrt station. sitting a little too far away from the stage, i couldn't really see much except the elaborate decorations of the setup and the golden finery adorned by the bride. the bride was beautiful. the groom was cute in a bashful way. at the end of the ceremony which i couldn't see much of, we made a line and went onstage and blessed the bride and the groom by scattering yellow rice on their heads. 

and then we had a buffet lunch of vegetarian indian food, and left with door gifts prettily wrapped. we haven't unwrapped ours yet so i don't know what's inside. 

after that, jia ling and i went to clarke quay to meet her friends irene and callie. reason being, callie and i were going to tag along with jia ling for her weekly dragonboat rowing exercise. i know, random right? jia ling, my partner-in-crime for doing random things in singapore (such as taking the mrt to barely-inhabited punggol to take pictures of lalang) entertains herself in curious ways, and because i also have a penchant for spontaneity and randomness, she invites me along sometimes. 

so we went to kallang river to get some serious workout. oh and if you're wondering i did not go into the water with my dress and heels. did have some leftover makeup on my face but since there wasn't much to begin with that wasn't a problem. went into a toilet and came out two inches shorter in beachwear. 

the dragonboat team we joined was the british team but there were also many other nationalities in the team (commonwealth yo). since many of the members were actually in putrajaya for a race (home T_T), there were only two boats that went into the water. jia ling went on the other boat with the experienced ones, while me and callie stayed on the newbie boat. along the river we saw teams of other countries, the germans who rowed how i imagined germans would row (like germans) and the irish team which was sponsored by a pub, among others.

i'm still waiting for my waist or arms to hurt. if my arms hurt, it would mean that my boat-rowing posture was wrong. since you're supposed to twist your waist and use the strength of the body instead of the arm. great for losing love handles, it seems, but after every row there is a huge barrel of beer waiting to cancel the workout out! but since half the team was gone for the putrajaya race yesterday, there was no beer T_T bollocks. 

speaking of canceling, we had an entirely stupid game on the boat called tug of war, where half of the boat would sit facing the other half, and row furiously to see which direction was stronger. completely waste of energy but the stupidity of the game kept me very much amused and i put in all of my energy to it. because, let's face it, most games are stupid and energy-wasting anyway. chasing, hitting, kicking, protecting an inanimate thing called "a ball" - multiple cases in point. it's not like a bridge construction where you actually have a bridge after hard labour. the dragonboat tug of war is just like a representation of all the games out there. useless but tremendous fun!

after the dragonboat rowing we went to bugis, to pass something to jia ling's friend and to have steamboat. only part of the plan came true. after jia ling stumbled unceremoniously down the escalator and our failure to get the mall staff to send us to the nearest hospital (the bastards), we ended up waiting a fair bit for the paramedics to arrive and bundle her off to sgh. the ambulance costs sgd80 to hail, by the way. missed opportunity T_T 

so callie and i reached sgh and went into a&e to find jia ling. had our temperatures screened because of the h1n1 scare. then there she was, forlornly huddled under a blanket on a wheelchair waiting at the x-ray dept. 

we were in the a&e from about 8:30pm to 11pm. here's an interesting fact for you - sgh, or sgh within the proximity of a&e anyway, does not have a single working food outlet after 8:30pm. what the staff themselves do is to order mcdonalds if they get really hungry. this makes no economic sense in any way. or maybe the hospital's profiteering from Cheers, a convenience store, in the neighbouring block, where everybody (who does not order mcdonalds) ends up in, for dinner. 

we had a picnic of sorts in a&e, eating nachos and cheese, microwaved pizza and instant noodles all bought from Cheers. and being asian and biologically wired to take pictures at any circumstance however dire, we found ourselves taking group self portraits with the food. also involuntary was the peace sign. it's almost a reflex - camera lens = peace sign. that's how we work it yo. 

jia ling was diagnosed to have an unobvious fracture in her ankle and had to get a pair of crutches. i think she must have forked out about SGD250-300. some of which can be claimed from insurance. the good news is she has got a six-day mc to get out of work. the bad news? she's a teacher and it's school holidays now. irony is such a kick in the crotch sometimes.

anyway i'm typing this while she's sleeping beside me. later i will be doing some shopping for her, as she will be pretty much incapacitated for the following few days. luckily she's staying in a master bedroom (attached bathroom) and has an electric kettle in her room. if i am confined within my room i will probably rot in a pool of my own excrement. i will end this post on that disturbing mental image because i'm sleepy now. 

Isi terpesong.

What do you do when you have written about 70% of a paper and find out that er... it... kinda... went out of topic

T_T

Change title? Try to gloss it over? Die die argue - what we say, cure the dead horse like it's alive?

No. You procrastinate and hope that the paper will rewrite itself while you blog.

I had a great night of sleep yesterday. Slept at 10:30pm and was knocked out till about 6:30am. Then woke up, turned to the other side, and slept some more till 8am. Then stared at the wall map until about 8:30am. Then got my lazy ass to school when I reaffirmed the nagging feeling I had all weekend - isi terpesong... now trying to figure out the next course of action.

I think I have a twisted pinky which makes it rather irritating to type. *flexes fingers* *gets irritated* *flexes fingers some more*

May be going back to KL this weekend to do some interviews for another term paper. This semester is flying by with record speed... My exams are less than a month away (!!) but I still have tons of coursework left, but I'm really glad that after this sem I will not have any more compulsory classes, but can choose to sit in and just learn without the pressure, damn it.

Intermission rant - I still don't get it why finals are weighted at 50% of the total marks. Why would they base 50% of my marks on a mere 3 hours when I spend at least ten times more hours on my term paper??

Oh yeah, I went for the Red Cross charity concert in our school last Saturday with Apurva, an undergrad from India whom I met during the Toy Museum outing. Most of the performances were quite high-school-ish - reminded me so much of Chong Hwa! Complete with the totally kayu emcees and badly rehearsed on-stage humour.

They had 二十四节令鼓 (played by like 8 people) and it was nowhere near Chong Hwa's standard ok... super miss Chong Hwa 二十四节令鼓, the people performing the other day just didn't possess the kind of collective energy and the war-like stance which is what I really liked about 二十四节令鼓 in Chong Hwa, really powerful stuff. Instead theirs was quite lethargic and was scattered sometimes *narrow eyes in disapproval*

And then there was this performance by an acclaimed pianist (according to the kayu emcees). Pianists play the piano. Singers sing. Some pianists may be blessed with good voices and hence can sing as they play. Mr. Acclaimed Pianist was not blessed as such. I don't understand why he chose to play two Chinese pop songs and to overpower his acclaimed piano skills with his lacklustre voice and weird pronunciation. He did make me miss YJ though - not because I associated YJ with his crappy performance, but because he was singing this song 一首简单的歌 by 王力宏.

His pronunciation and slightly off key tones made this progression:
一首简单的歌 ==> 一首煎蛋的歌 ==> 一首Zyan Tan 的歌

So yes. I missed Zyan Tan (YJ).

I know a lot of effort is put into organizing stuff like these, especially a charity concert with noble intentions, and they raised like 7k for the Red Cross Disabled Home. I just can't resist to make mean comments about crappy performances however noble the intentions were.

But! All is not lost! There was one performance that saved it all - and that was The Strikeforce, a drum team which was so uplifting, so passionate, so crazily fun that all my grouses were wiped out and I was thankful that I went to this concert instead of just throwing the ticket away. Good performances like these - they just make you want to laugh and to clap and to whoop (Weeeee!) and to revel in the raw energy. You could see that the performers had fun. They were dancing to their beat and laughing, like they weren't performing but just a bunch of crazy kids enjoying making synchronized noise.

Some idea of how The Strikeforce is like:


The passive crowd went wild from being all glazed from tolerating the previous acts. I couldn't stop smiling. Then a local celebrity came in to perform as the last act and it was all =_= again. OMG the stupid jokes (if you can't execute humour with finesse, then just pretend to be cool and not talk) and he was like "Careful with my guitar" when the emcees came to pretend to fawn over him (really badly rehearsed) after his first performance. Snooty kid.

OK I am gratified with all the mean comments. Back to the real world where I shall... figure out what to do with my terpesong piece. Joy.

I have poser brains.

Happy little me went on the KTM website tonight to book my return ticket from KL.
KTM website had a little facelift and looks marginally cooler now.
The facelift probably caused some bugs in the system though.
How could all the tickets be booked out already? It's only Thursday night!

Then I realized.

All the tertiary institutions in this (tiny) part of the world are having their recess week.
Half of the students are from Malaysia.
Not only did I not do the math, I wasn't even aware I was having math lessons.
I am truly fucked.

Gutted.

Down. down. down. down. down.

Got my exam results back and for the course that I studied for the most, I got a B-. B Freaking Minus. I'm not going to lie about my utmost disappointment. I was so sure that I had executed the arguments coherently and convincingly. And this is the same prof who said that there are no wrong answers, just bad answers. Which means that my answers were bad. Like way off mark.

A colleague, who doesn't even know how to cite references and *censored to protect the innocent*, actually got a B. WTFFFFF. OK I'm feeling really inferior now. Someone just knock me down dead, please. And if I get wind that, God forbid, the Assignment Wrecker from Hell got anything like B and above, heads will freaking roll. ROLL, I tell you.

I've emailed the prof to schedule a session with him to at least let me know where I went wrong. I mean we got an A for his assignment, which means that I flopped majorly in the test to pull my scores down. Honestly I wouldn't care as much if I had got a B (which I was aiming for) and if I had studied less for it. The other two tests that I didn't study as much for, I got A and A-.

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghh.

The writing of the research proposal is coming along very slowly as I am experiencing extreme mood swings of YES I CAN DO IT to NO I WILL NEVER GRADUATE AND I WILL GET STUCK IN SINGAPORE FOREVER AND BE FORCED TO MARRY IN ORDER TO OWN A HDB.

*sob*

And this exam result business has me visualizing the decor and location of my HDB. Preferably without window grilles and somewhere high so it'll be easier to kill myself in a dramatic move to leave this cruel world.

OK no more energy.

Back
to
work.

=(

Why am I blogging this?

I've lost my glasses and have been groping around the room for them for the past 15 minutes like half a blind bat. Or a half blind bat. Whatever. Whoever that hid my glasses, it's not funny! The mystery is that I took them off before going to bed, putting them on my bedside table as usual, and now they're gone!

*WTFness growl*

Update after 2 minutes
They were in the bathroom =_=
Now I can see again

Could be worse, could be worse.

This morning at 6am when I was sending Jia Ling to the taxi stand, there was a dodgy looking guy standing outside our hostel. Jia Ling remarked to me, "There's a dodgy-looking guy outside our hostel," and I was like, "How do you know he's dodgy?"

Turns out that Jia Ling has the instincts of a watchdog in smelling crime. While I was walking out with Jia Ling, said Dodgy-Looking-Guy went into our hostel, bypassed a sleeping hostel worker and another one in the toilet, got into our dorm (me and Jia Ling were the only guests in the hostel), nicked Jia Ling's camera which was charging in the socket, my broken camera, wallet and old phone in my bag, and new phone which was on my bed.

On his way out, he met me on my way into my room (Oh here's the dodgy looking guy! I didn't know he was working in this hostel!), nodded at the hostel manager behind me, and walked down the steps. I was in my room for 3 seconds when the hostel manager asked me if I knew that guy. Nope I didn't, I thought he knew that guy. I saw the missing camera, and the hostel manager sped off in pursuit of the thief - to no avail. In the meanwhile I identified the rest of the missing stuff, noting in great relief that my passport was untouched and that my IC I had left back in KL, and called my dad to have my cards cancelled.

Then began the arduous process of filing a police report. I did one at a walking distance from the hostel with Alan the hostel manager, gave my account of the event to an officer who typed the report out painstakingly with two fingers. He then asked me to go to another area in Karamunsing (I think) at 9am to meet a certain Inspector Azaman.

The hostel owner, Richard, came and brought me out for an apologetic breakfast which I ate with his wife who's an avid backpacker herself. Richard, a man of Chinese ethnicity who was born in Uganda, raised in the UK (holds a UK passport as well) and is married with a local, obviously loves Sabah very much and repeatedly apologized, telling me not to be deterred from visiting again. I assured him that I wouldn't be. I mean after all things like this happen everywhere, if I were to be deterred I might as well stop travelling altogether.

At 9am we (Alan, Richard and I) went to the other police station and waited till 9:40am (9am Malaysian-civil-servant-time), when this inspector finally turned up and took down my statement (yet again). S-l-0-w-l-y. A muscular police guy listened to part of my statement and disappeared. About 30 minutes later when I was still making my statement, Mr. Muscular Policeman came back and asked me what colour my wallet was. He then pulled my blue-coloured clutch purse and a rabbit out of his tophat. Well, minus the rabbit and the tophat. But I was really amazed at the sheer speed that he managed to retrieve my purse, sans the money of course, but all my cards and documents were intact, that's a relief.

So, finally, at about 11am we reached back to the hostel, me being quite entirely exhausted because of the hectic events of the morning. Sent an email to Jia Ling to tell her about the tragic loss of her camera, which she kindly loaned to me to use because mine was broken. She's probably still blissfully ignorant of the turn of events at this moment.

Kesimpulannya - although I managed to lose 2 cameras (one broken anyway), 2 handphones and a sum of money (not all my money but big enough sum to make me wince), things could be much worse, because my documents are all intact, and by a miraculous stroke of luck we managed to have backups of all our photos! How on earth, you wonder. Well, after breaking my camera, I gave my card to Nex for him to save his pictures into my card, so my card was actually not in the camera when it was stolen. Stroke of Luck #2, Jia Ling emptied her pictures into the hostel computer to upload into Flickr and to save into her external harddisk (which did not work) and I was supposed to save them into a thumb drive borrowed from Nex, so her stolen camera was actually empty as well. And I didn't bring my laptop, thank god!

So yeah, a lesson was learnt, minus the tremendous hassle of retrieving all the important documents and the heartbreak of losing all the travel pictures. Just that I'm now much poorer, and I've lost everybody's phone contacts. Help me by emailing me your number, that would be great.

Going back to KL this evening, see you guys at home later!

So long suckers!

I've gotta pack as usual. So far I have accomplished dragging my backpack out of its drawer and smiling amiably at it.

Hello backpack my old friend! Looks like we're flying off tomorrow. Would you be a dear and pack yourself? No? Hey don't use that tone with me young man. Fine! Be that way.

The customary procrastination before packing. Ahhhhhh. The smell of freedom. *sniff sniff* Doesn't smell like anything in particular but is still intoxicating no less.

What I've been up to lately. Reverse chronologically - got interviewed by someone from The Straits Times (only the most important paper in Singapore) on Couchsurfing this evening. She'll notify me if it gets published, i.e. it's still in the early planning stage. This morning had the last exam of this semester!! Wahahahaha! Yesterday got to know from a very reliable source that my homosexuality group project got A. Wahahaha!! Sometime this week I went to see Dr. I and got the results of my other term paper, A+ =D Conference conference!! Sometime two weeks ago got an invitation to review a journal article from the Journal of the Royal Anthropological Institute, my first ever invitation to do that! (I even emailed the editor to see if there was a mistake in identity =_=)

What I'm going to be up to for the following month. Chronologically - here's my itinerary for Kota Kinabalu, thanks to dear Nex!

Sat 22 - Reach KK at night
Sun 23 - Market in the morning, depart for White Water Rafting by 9am, return to KK by 3pm, transfer to Weston Wetlands
Mon 24 - Weston Wetlands
Tue 25 - Weston Wetlands, return to KK by evening
Wed 26 - Bamboo Festival in the morning, then explore KK in the afternoon and laze around the beach in the evening and watch the sun set.
Thu 27 - Island hopping (back to KK by 4:30pm), departure in the evening

Then I'll fly home =D Spend a week or so in KL =D Book launch on the 5th. Conveniently missing the date for my half-marathon... sigh... yes I am feeling stupid now, 3 months after enrolling myself for that half-marathon. Yeah I'm a lazy bum and I screwed up =( After a week in KL come back to Singapore. Stay put for the rest of December to revise the term paper for submission to conferences and journals, do my research on PhD and sneak in a little French here and there.

Yeah so. Looks like I got a pretty full plate for the time being. But yes. Freedom feels good!!!

Looks like there won't be any packing done today. If you're lucky there may be another packing post tomorrow =D And behold - the longest label list ever:

Moment of Truth

知己。Literally translated - "know yourself". Meaning of word - best friend who knows you better than you. It really takes a best friend (I am lucky to have a few best friends, so "best" not as in superlative) to knock some sense into you.

*POW*

Haha I've been such an ass for the past few days. Been painfully oblivious to so many obvious things, been self-indulgent to the point of terrorism, been immature bordering on childishness. In true Taurean spirit I went for it, with tunnel vision, insisting that I could fix it, I could make it better, everything will be alright if I am determined to make it better. At a point there was even a flowchart in my head. If, then, else. Loop.

*BANG*

When what I should have done was to leave the problem alone. But the time pressure blinded me. I still have time! I can fix it! Please let me fix it! It's so simple!

*BOOM*

So what I did was to screw things up to the point of no return, when my intention was to salvage what I could. Irony irony irony. So is life. And I would've continued with the downward spiral if it weren't for you. My best friend, my mirror.

Pain. Pain because I see how stupid and simplistic I'd been. Pain because I can see it so clearly in theory but it's not within my practical control. Pain! Why the hell am I trying to explain my pain just pain lah damnit raw stinging teeth-gritting pain. Fuck.

Tomorrow I'll wake up into strong mode again, a useful self-defense mechanism. But still have to go through tonight. Tomorrow my new shell will withstand the stinging humiliation. But tonight still have to pack. Tomorrow I will move on. Tomorrow quickly come. Now have to quickly pack.

I'm sorry. I'm rarely like that. You just caught me at the worst possible moment. I'm sorry.

And Ying Jian, thanks. I love you mate.

Well, so much for trying.

I peed, finally.

I think I am going to wake up feeling extremely foolish tomorrow.

Hike up Batu Tambur Hill.

At least that's what I think the hill is called. It's at Melawati, near the Klang Gates Dam. All the place names in this post are accurate to the blogger's best knowledge, which isn't very good at all.

From the past two rather pleasant treks, I was eager to go for the third one that Chindiana organized. This time the party grew to the size of eight, from the previous three and six, with Chindiana, Nex, Grace, Edward that I know; and Reuben, Gavin and Serena. Han Solo has been transfered to JB and I shall only see her when I'm in Singapore.

When Chindiana called me yesterday and told me roughly what to expect, I happily said okay to everything. Almost vertical climbing for one hour? Can. Lose your footing, and you will fall like 200-300 metres down? Can. After this hike you give me your firstborn? Can can, everything can. Just bring me along, damnit!

So we set off this morning, in two cars, took the ultra long route via MRR (when we could have taken the much shorter route via Jalan Kuching passing Batu Caves =D Halfway through we wondered if we were actually going to Seremban!) and reached the base at about 8:30am. The climbing began almost immediately.

Heheh.

Like probably one tenth of the way up, I started to realize that my expectations of flat road, climbing, flat road, climbing again - were quite unfounded and largely imagined. It was climbing, climbing, climbing.... ALL the way up. *will karate chop anyone who says "I told you so"* I trudged along, but after another one sixteenth of the way, I had this most compelling urge to lie down, turn over and fall asleep. Instead, I crouched on the ground and puked one third of my breakfast out.

Fractions seem to dominate my mind this evening.

Luckily the others were too far ahead to witness the debacle from close. Under the encouragement of Chindi and Nex a few metres up, I hauled myself up and continued to heave one leg in front of the other. Sweating profusely and feeling like giving up every ten steps I took. Fortunately the guys wouldn't hear of it and kept cheering me on.

Memories of past hiking experiences flashed in front of my eyes - the time when I almost fell off the cliff from walking on a damp metal pipe when on a school trip to Gua Tempurung (I think), very dangerous indeed in hindsight; the time when I had to stop while walking with Val along Abel Tasman National Park; family outing to Gasing Hill... okay. I'm not good at this. History has proven so.

I could hear Chindi and Nex in front, arguing over who should accompany me and who should proceed. "You go ahead lah!" "No, you go ahead!" Aiks. Sorry lah guys. At the end Nex stayed back to keep the resident old lady company, and Chindi went on to join the rest. Light-headed and heavy-footed, I managed to get to the peak (that's what I hope it was) and we decided that we wouldn't follow the others through the more challenging route, but we would hang around then take the original route down.

After I caught my breath the world became beautiful again. The air was cool, the KL skyline was visible (albeit within a grey cloud of smog) and there was a curious bumble bee with its abdomen striped metallic blue and black, buzzing around. Nex and I had a good leisurely chat on general topics like building sustainable homes and communes, and Star Wars movie props.

When the time came that we should begin to descend the hill, I stood up and felt that something was amiss.

OMFG.

I would refer to it later to the others as a "wardrobe malfunction", but to put it in plain prose - I had ripped my pants. In fact, it was not so much as a rip than a huge, 20cm long gash, probably resulted from leaning my butt liberally on jagged rocks. I didn't even know when it happened.

Quite aghast, the trip downhill was rapid and purposeful. Nex moved in front and luckily we didn't meet too many people, and when we did I had to shield my back with my backpack. In my hurry, I slipped and fell and bruised my lower back. Ouch.

In view of the series of unfortunate and embarrassing events, the optimistic voice at the back of my head pointed out how it could be worse. I could've been with the rest of the guys when the gash happened, and it would have been loads more uncomfortable. For, ripped pants are like car accidents, they're horrific but you can't stop looking at them. The fall could have cut me on where the pants were ripped. Or, I could, like Jen Hui suggested later, have been wearing a bright red pair of underwear instead of the inconspicuous black pair.

Could be worse, could be worse.

Nex and I reached the bottom of the hill in due time where we waited for the others to reach the car. When they did, I asked Grace if she had extra pants, which apparently she did. But of course it would be too easy if I were to slip blithely into her pants and close the case. Nope, of course not. I wouldn't fit. There was no blitheness to speak of. Reluctantly I surrendered Grace's shorts back to her. Edward from the other car offered me his extra pair of pants then.

I eyed Edward's slim physique and asked apprehensively, "Do you think that I could fit into them?" Because, it is one case to be unable to fit into dainty S-sized girl's pants and quite a different case to be too big for a guy's pair. The embarrassment would be too much to bear within a day, although I do have a high threshold for embarrassment. Fortunately, the pants flung over to me was as big as a tent, and fit me comfortably.

I am relieved to say that the rest of the day went on without further complications. I successfully belanja-ed chicken rice to part of the group (sorry for those who had nasi campur), since I promised to the last time when I forgot my wallet. After getting home, Jen Hui and I spent a glorious afternoon in the Popular Book Fest in KL Convention Centre, resulting in me spending more money on books - but I bought Chinese books! I haven't read Chinese books in ages so it is justified! - and her on English novels and CDs.

Pretty sore legs at the end of the day, partly from standing too long at the book fest and partly from the partially completed hike.

***

To The Hiking Peeps: Thanks guys, for bringing me along, pushing me a bit but not too much, lending me pants and everything. And on top of all those, for not laughing (openly) at me. Heheh. Thanks a million!

To Jen Hui: We shall find love! And I don't mean on the back cover of the Brian McKnight CD that you bought!

To Everyone Else: Ei, you people do realize that I'm going to be off in about 2 weeks' time and you'll never get to see me in a looooong while right? Why is noone asking me out? I'm free most of the time till 18 June. Call/text/email me. If you want to meet within 18 June - 21 July we can probably work something else up in between my travel plans.

***

In other news: Cooking Mentor Robert's coming to Singapore and Malaysia!!!!!!!! Woo hoo!!!!!!!!! He's going to arrive at Singapore at 15 July, slight glitch at the travel period because Val's leaving on the same day back Germany =( But he's coming!! And the crazy guy is planning to cycle from Singapore to Hong Kong, wahaha... We might meet in Malacca if he doesn't get to KL by the time I leave to Singapore. Will work out something.

***

Wooh. Ultra long post. This post sat in my drafts overnight because I kept falling asleep while editing it. I'm itching all over. Mozzie bites and lots of tiny scratches which are bloody itchy!!

Dear Readers,

I extend to you a sincere and heartfelt apology about an editorial error in the previous post, where I mistook the popular saying "Sweet as, bro" for "Sweet ass, bro".

To my defense, "sweet ass, bro" is more sound grammatically and logically, with a cheeky ring which urges common usage. "Sweet as" is a cliffhanger though (Sweet as sugar. Sweet as a girl. Sweet as my itsy bitsy teeny weenie yellow polka dot bikini.), and NZlanders are suckers for hanging off cliffs.

And happy Deepavali you guys!!!!! Why NZ no public holiday!!!

Over and out.

HELP!!!!!

Long story short.

MORONIC Sony Service Centre went and formatted my laptop for me, WITHOUT GETTING MY PERMISSION.

My precious photos are inside, some data from my research, music that I painstakingly ripped and catalogued, basically 2 months of my life are inside that hard disk.

Techies out there, please tell me, if there is any way to recover the data within. My OS is Windows Vista Home Premium. I think they performed a system recovery on my harddisk which restored it to factory settings. The data should still be inside the harddisk right?? Just that there's no way to read it?? Is there any software that I can download to extract the data?? Should I not touch the harddisk now for fear that anything will be overwritten??

I am as desperate as I sound. Help.

Unlucky/Lucky

'Twas an unlucky week.
I opened a door too close to my toe and scraped some skin off. I got rejected by NUS (yeah, again, what's new?). My router modem went crazy and I failed to convince the warranty guy to take it back. I lost the security thingy of my mum's car so I got stranded in LowYat and had to be rescued. I almost hurtled down a flight of stairs and bruised my elbow while breaking the fall.

'Twas a lucky week.
The toe I scraped has the most ineffective bunch of nerve ends in my body. I now have an excuse to look for other exotic places (which, Singapore is not) to get a postgrad education. I have a great computer support guy who accepts steamboats as payment, and he has loaned me his spare router+modem and promised to manja the warranty guy until he agrees to fix my faulty modem. Despite being of great inconvenience to my parents and friends they still love me. Enough to uninstall me from LowYat at least.

Lastly, I am still in one piece and elbow bruises are apparently as negligible as toe scrapes. Guess I'm still lucky in a big scale. To the coming week of mishaps: Bring it!

Shopping then Police Station

So Jen Hui and I went shopping today. I paid RM30 for a bunch of Estee Lauder samples from the kind lady at the counter - much less than what I had expected to spend. A small part of me feels that I shouldn't be paying for samples with "Not for Individual Sale" printed on them, but I've got dry patches on my face and am desperate to de-dehydrate them. And I'm unwilling to fork out RM90 to gamble that their cleanser is that good. (RM165 for the moisturizer! *faint*)

And I got an absolutely adorable jumper from Zara which has blue cats printed all over it! My dad says that it looks like a kid's pyjama but mum, in a midst of a busy phone conversation shook her head absently when I asked her if it was so. I choose to believe her. The jumper cost RM130 (Original price RM160). Ahem.

*hypnotizes self that I haven't been shopping lately hence the expenditure is justifiable*
*still feels guilty*
*tells self: KJ has got a pair of much-envied 8GB iPhones and a 2-year subscription with AT&T! And he's jobless, on top of that has a baby coming soon!*
*feels a bit better*

Halfway through our shopping expedition JenHui found that she had lost her phone. It was apparent when we tried to connect to it using my phone that it was turned off. It was really too bad. Therefore at 5pm we found ourselves to be at the Damansara police station to lodge a report for JenHui to retrieve her number.

While waiting for JenHui as she poured out her woes to the friendly neighbourhood policeman, I entertained myself by looking at a huge stain at the ceiling probably caused by a leak. The police station was awfully stuffy and quite small. Half way through my daydreaming I noticed an officer bringing in two pairs of handcuffs. He headed into a room with tinted windows (but I found that if I looked carefully I could actually see the people inside).

The woman sitting beside me who was totally motionless previously, stood up to talk to the officer. There were two officers inside the room and a couple. I witnessed the handcuffing of the couple. This is the first time that I've seen handcuffs in real life. Thick, metallic and cold. It must be terrifying to have one of those binding my hands.

"Dari kecil sampai besar dia tak pernah curi," pleaded the lady who talked to the officer. She was objecting to the use of handcuffs. The officer was sympathetic and gentle as he told her that it was a standard procedure. I kept my eyes down while catching bits of the conversation. She was the sister of the girl who got caught. Judging by the Jusco plastic bags by the door, I deduce that that was the crime scene.

"Kamu adik dia juga?" The officer asked me. I shook my head bashfully and clarified that I was accompanying JenHui. At that juncture JenHui finally finished her reporting and we left the police station.

The handcuffs are still lingering in my mind. I wonder where the girl would be sent to. I wonder why she did what she did. She doesn't look like the type who has sticky hands. Was it an act of desperation? Was she a kleptomaniac? Was she influenced by her boyfriend? Or vice versa? And why did they look so calm when the cops cuffed them?

Anyway, it was an eventful day. I'm exhausted from all the walking under the sun - two times to and fro from the farthest end of the Dataran Parking beside Giant, to Giant! Going to bed early tonight.